A few months back, Web Developer Ross Atkinson requested a vacation day for Friday, April 29. No one thought anything unusual until ABC News posted this incriminating photo [left]. “I didn’t think anyone at work would actually be following the royal wedding coverage,” stated Atkinson. “What can I say, I think Will and Kate are a great couple. So I may have been a little too involved in the ceremony, but I wore my good flannel.”

Due to the rapid growth at Element Headquarters in De Pere, WI, ownership has decided to expand internationally, opening an office in Granada, Spain.

“It just made sense that Spain would be our next location. Megan [McNulty] speaks broken Spanish almost fluently, and nearly every one of us knows words like ‘cerveza’ and ‘vino’. It should be a really smooth transition,” says Element Owner, Lance Peroutka.

Account Assistant, Megan McNulty, returned to the office yesterday, after spending two weeks abroad forming new business relationships, organizing the new office and taking up smoking. However, on the second day of the trip, tragedy struck.

On their way to a dinner meeting, McNulty and Element Granada employee, Estefania Lopez, stopped at an ATM on the side of the road. Almost immediately, the two were mugged by a group of Spanish boys.  According to police reports, the boys ranged from 11-13 years of age, each weighing about 68 pounds each.  The two employees were able to fight off their attackers using choke slamming and jiu jitsu methods of combat. Luckily, the attackers made off with nothing more than a chunk of hair out of Lopez’s head.

“On the bright side, I was happy to finally put my martial arts training to good use,” said McNulty.

“I think maybe Spain was a big step for us. We’ve unfortunately closed Element Granada, but are still looking to expand. Perhaps Appleton, WI, or maybe even Madison.” Said Peroutka.

Element has generously covered the costs of Lopez’ hair replacement.

Due to the overwhelming response of her online silk floral arrangement business, Nikki Pribnow has now started her own florist shop, right out of her office! “Well, I have a lot of extra space,” said Pribnow. “And this will allow me to multitask between marketing projects. I cannot wait to start offering my clients beautiful flower bouquets! I mean, who wouldn’t want a dozen roses delivered along side their 5,000 corporate brochures.”

Element wishes her the best of luck (and a happy birthday)!

Due to high stress levels, the office moose has (yet again!) started to consume unhealthy levels of alcohol. After two visits to De Pere’s local detox center, and one very expensive, company paid, all-inclusive stay at the Betty Ford Center, there seems to be no hope in sight.

Employees have tried their best to be supportive. Megan McNulty was even reportedly seen drinking her beer in the bathroom just so he would not feel pressured. But that still did not work. He just outsmarted everyone by constructing an eight-foot straw. The moose declined to comment.

In 2007, Element’s customer holiday gift package was a “cookie kit” that included a custom designed plate. Recently, Ann Behling, Director of Publications, discovered something when shopping for an ugly Christmas sweater. It looks like these plates are now available at a local Goodwill and can be purchased for under $2.00! The cookies may be gone, but the ceramic is here to stay.

Patrick McCormick, former member of Element’s interactive department, has been promoted to Barista. With the recent need for a higher-powered stimulant, and an obvious lack of interest in Folgers Original, promoting McCormick was an easy decision. His main duties include making foam, purchasing milk, and cleaning the recently purchased espresso machine.

“As part of Patrick’s promotion, we supplied him with a variety of aprons, a serving tray, and a really nice magnetized notepad to take down our orders,” said one of Element’s owners. “It was all part of the negotiation process, but well worth it.”

McCormick is extremely happy with his new promotion, although he noted one problem. “Grinding each individual coffee bean by hand takes a long time. But nothing is too good for all of my co-workers, and I’m sure they’ll eventually buy me a grinder … I hope.”

Due to inclement weather, the Atkinson family has made Element a temporary home. “Our furnace went out about a week ago,” said Web Developer Ross Atkinson, “And, well, I don’t know why it’s not fixed yet. But everyone seems to like it here, so I’m in no big rush.”

Atkinson mentioned that the office has all the same comforts of home, and is 30 times the size.  “There’s beer, Captain Morgan, and a retention pond for me to ice fish. Oh, and an indoor toilet, which is really nice.”

The Element employees have not seemed to mind the Atkinson family taking up shelter in the common areas of the office. It appears there is plenty of space, including a loft to hide the family when clients come in. An employee (who wished to remain anonymous) stated, “We treat everyone here at Element like family.  That’s why we pretend it’s no big deal, and then talk about it behind their back. Though the hair that is left in the men’s bathroom sink is getting a little out of control. We should really say something about that.”

The Atkinson family plans to stay at the office through Christmas, and possibly until January. “It’s the perfect place to spend the holidays. Office supplies make great gifts! Don’t tell my wife, but I got her something real nice from the Staples catalog.”

Click thumbnail to see winning ad

Element is proud to announce that Minnesota Energy Resources has received second place in the best business ad category in the E-Source Utility Print Ad Awards contest! Electric and gas utilities across North America were encouraged to submit their best newspaper, magazine, outdoor display, or other print ads in two categories: promoting utility products and programs for both residential and business customers, and building and/or establishing the utility company’s brand. An independent group of judges selected the winners based on ad effectiveness, objectives, message, visual design, and innovation.

Some see a man revealing a cleanly shaven face to his wife for the first time in their 10-year marriage. But here at Element, we see a blank canvas!

Here are some of our suggestions of how Copywriter, Eric Severstad, should proceed with his look in the future. Great job Element employees on your cutting, pasting and drawing skills!

We are very proud to announce that our new office was featured in the latest issue of i4Design Magazine!

Excerpt: Last fall, Element left behind a cramped, generic space, and moved into new “unconventional” digs just down the road. From the start, Peroutka envisioned that the 9,000-plus square foot building would have a “modern industrial feel.” Architect Rick Fisher and builders DeLeers Construction, an Element client, helped bring his creative ideas to fruition.

“It was a fun project to work on,” says Paul DeLeers, Vice President of DeLeers Construction. “They are a creative organization, so it makes sense that their office follows suit.”

Read the full article.

i4Design Magazine is published five times per year, and is distributed to design professionals including interior designers, architects and design-build firms in the Midwest.